JERRY SPRINGER


 

Dan had the good fortune to be selected for the first season of America's Got Talent on NBC. Dan flew to Los Angeles, where he was booked in a luxurious hotel in Universal City. Backstage at the event, he saw things he never thought he would see. He saw an Asian man teaching an African-American man how to breakdance. He saw a guy in a silver angel suit having his skin spray-painted silver by three other girls who had silver paint all over them. He saw joggers, acrobats, singers - everything one could possibly imagine.

It turned out that Jerry Springer, of all people, was the person who would interview people before they went on stage, and after their performances. Dan found him to be extremely, extremely nice and down to earth. Dan had done some research on Jerry and found that he is worth about half a billion dollars, and that he was the producer of his own show and the brains behind his whole operation – essentially the judge and jury all in one. Dan realized that not only is he an entertainer, he is also a very shrewd businessman.

Unfortunately, Dan didn't fare very well on the show. Pierce Brosnan buzzed him out within 10 seconds, and then David Hasselhoff and Paula Abdul buzzed him out shortly thereafter. Dan was crestfallen, and he just couldn't understand what was going on. He thought that part of the problem was that Sharon Osbourne interviewed him on stage before he started telling his jokes, which was something he hadn't expected, and it completely threw him off. In general, it is not a good idea to interview a comedian when he's on stage and about to do his act.

Anyway, Dan was so bummed out, but Jerry was extremely, extremely sympathetic about it and was kind enough to take a picture with him.